“What they had done was risky and stupid. He forced himself not to dwell on the whys and wherefores. Hundreds of hours with shrinks hadn’t reached the root of his vulnerability. There are two things at work here, the shrinks would tell him: love and sex. But it was only the sex part that they could explain. Not the love part. It was beyond their analysis, beyond their definitions, beyond their conclusions. And his. Worse, it had all come back in a flash, revising the fire in long-smoldering embe...rs. Reimagining their early encounters had been a powerful aphrodisiac. Such fantasies were unstoppable, despite keeping his physical distance, and a massive effort at self-discipline. He was well aware that it had always been the prime obsession of his life. He knew, too, the power of its consequences. All efforts at normality in his relationships with women had gone awry. Even the shrinks had observed that the obsession might be the root cause of his other failures, suggesting that he felt so unworthy and guilt-stricken that he deliberately evaded success.MoreLessRead More Read Less
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