The Secret
“Cancer. I had avoided the specific subject before because I was not sure I could handle it.
She was not afraid. Her chief worry was that I would not be able to rear Len properly, and she asked me for certain promises about that. I was to see to it that he got a fine education and entered a learned profession. He was not to become a street hustler. He was not to be like Buddy. What she meant, of course, was that he was not to be like me. We might have a fine, successful business, she and I, but I had started out a street hustler, and, whatever Len became, he was not to start that way.
The only question was, would we tell him she was dying? We agreed not to. The shock would be bad enough. Anticipation would be worse. It was worse for me. It nearly destroyed me. If not for the knowledge that I had a son to raise, I think it might have led me to suicide. I am honestly not at all sure I would be alive today if it had not been for my son. I couldn’t abandon him. I could readily have abandon...ed everything and everyone else.MoreLess
She was not afraid. Her chief worry was that I would not be able to rear Len properly, and she asked me for certain promises about that. I was to see to it that he got a fine education and entered a learned profession. He was not to become a street hustler. He was not to be like Buddy. What she meant, of course, was that he was not to be like me. We might have a fine, successful business, she and I, but I had started out a street hustler, and, whatever Len became, he was not to start that way.
The only question was, would we tell him she was dying? We agreed not to. The shock would be bad enough. Anticipation would be worse. It was worse for me. It nearly destroyed me. If not for the knowledge that I had a son to raise, I think it might have led me to suicide. I am honestly not at all sure I would be alive today if it had not been for my son. I couldn’t abandon him. I could readily have abandon...ed everything and everyone else.MoreLess
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