The Reluctant Elf (Kindle Single)
“I’m used to parenting a moderately challenging but essentially well-behaved child, not the spawn of Satan. Oliver and Amanda won’t be easy to reason with, and if I lock them in their room they’ll probably chew their way out.‘Well I’m sure you got some nice presents from Father Christmas,’ although they deserve a lump of coal and smack on the arse. ‘Why don’t you play with those?’ ‘I’m bored!’‘Me too.’‘Great, then you can come upstairs with me and clean the bathrooms. Shall I get you some rubber gloves?’They run together into the parlour.Sometimes reverse psychology does work. I go into Prunella’s room first. It’s a tip. There are towels strewn all over the bed and the duvet has been pulled on to the floor. I wonder if that’s where she makes Hugo sleep, in a little nest at the foot of the bed. One end of the rug is coated in talcum powder and there are ring marks on the side tables where they haven’t bothered to use the coasters. It’s probably good that they usually go away for expensi...ve holidays.MoreLess
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