“Being mistress of the Palace of Illusions had transformed me in ways I hadn't realized. I was no longer intimidated by the Kaurava court, and though Duryodhan's new palace impressed many visitors with its sparkling novelties, I saw at once that it was merely a pale copy of ours, without true magic to give it a soul. Nor did the elders intimidate me. I found myself speaking to the blind king Dhritarashtra, Kripa, and even Drona, my brother's nemesis, with polite self-possession. The grandfather ...watched my conversations with approval in his eye, and when we were alone, he said, “Why, you've become a true queen now, equal to the best of us! You no longer care what people think of you, and that has given you a great freedom.” He didn't know the shifting sands on which my freedom rested, nor that my confidence ebbed each time I entered a hall and only returned when I'd ascertained that Karna wasn't present. He didn't know how much I cared about all the wrong things.But he was right in this: in some matters, I was equal to—or better off than—his peers.MoreLessRead More Read Less
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