The Guy Not Taken
“First they shot pool, then they’d played poker with laundry quarters and subway tokens. Poker had seemed like a good idea when Tom, the best man, broke out the cards, only he’d insisted that the winner of each hand do a shot, which meant that by the fifth hand there was a lot of inadvertent bluffing going on.Things deteriorated after midnight when four of the groom’s fellow lab mates split a cab back to Manhattan and the room began to empty out. Clouds of smoke and the sour reek of beer hung ov...er the bar’s scarred wooden tables and overflowing ashtrays. Tom presented Neil, the groom, with his wedding gift, which turned out to be a three-quarter ounce of marijuana wrapped, as Neil described it, in a festive matrimonial Baggie. Tom, with his face flushed and long strands of brown hair sticking to his sweaty cheeks, liked the sound of that so much he repeated it over and over as the first bowl was packed and the pipe went around: Festive Matrimonial Baggie!Half an hour later the stripper arrived—dressed, for some reason, like Snow White, in a tight red top and a full blue skirt, with her lips painted into a crimson Cupid’s bow.MoreLess
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