The Encyclopedia of Me (2012)
“Magazines will go the way of the dodo soon because everyone has the Internet and it is much quicker to get instant, up-to-the-minute celeb facts from the Web than it is to wait for someone to bother to print up something that you only have to recycle later.
Now that I’ve been a part of the world’s worst, ugliest photo, I want nothing more to do with magazines. In fact, if I find out tomorrow that magazines are gone forever, I will celebrate with a small party where I invite all my friends a...nd we drink Kool-Aid and eat white cupcakes with strawberries perched daintily on the top.
And now I have one more reason to hate magazines, Everybody in particular, but I am sure they are all Purveyors of Evil, so I’m willing to lump them all in together in one giant, sweeping generalization of lameosity.
One word: Interview.
Here’s what happened: I was in the kitchen, blending up frozen hunks of organic strawberries, mangoes, and bananas for a smoothie,84 when Dad came into the room looking pretty pleased with himself.MoreLess
Now that I’ve been a part of the world’s worst, ugliest photo, I want nothing more to do with magazines. In fact, if I find out tomorrow that magazines are gone forever, I will celebrate with a small party where I invite all my friends a...nd we drink Kool-Aid and eat white cupcakes with strawberries perched daintily on the top.
And now I have one more reason to hate magazines, Everybody in particular, but I am sure they are all Purveyors of Evil, so I’m willing to lump them all in together in one giant, sweeping generalization of lameosity.
One word: Interview.
Here’s what happened: I was in the kitchen, blending up frozen hunks of organic strawberries, mangoes, and bananas for a smoothie,84 when Dad came into the room looking pretty pleased with himself.MoreLess
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