The Donut Diaries
“Well, today was different.
I was settling down at my desk for English with Miss Brotherton, contemplating a quick round of Speedbum, when two prefects came in. One was my old enemy, Ivan the Terrible. He was still limping from his mishap with the poo, but it looked like it had just been a sprain and not a break.
Pity.
I didn’t know the name of the other prefect, but he always followed Ivan around, the way a smell of egg follows a fart. He had a zit on the side of his nose that was actually bigg...er than the nose itself, so it looked like the spot had a nose rather than the other way round. Ivan was no genius, but the spotty prefect was the kind of kid who’d stick his finger up his bum and act surprised when it didn’t smell of flowers.
‘We’ve come for Milligan. Mr Whale wants him,’ said Ivan, not showing very much respect for Miss Brotherton. That was quite risky. Miss Brotherton could be pretty fierce, in a big-nosed, woodpeckery kind of way. Which, I admit, is not the fiercest kind of fierce, but it’s more fierce than being fierce in a rabbitty way, for example.MoreLess
I was settling down at my desk for English with Miss Brotherton, contemplating a quick round of Speedbum, when two prefects came in. One was my old enemy, Ivan the Terrible. He was still limping from his mishap with the poo, but it looked like it had just been a sprain and not a break.
Pity.
I didn’t know the name of the other prefect, but he always followed Ivan around, the way a smell of egg follows a fart. He had a zit on the side of his nose that was actually bigg...er than the nose itself, so it looked like the spot had a nose rather than the other way round. Ivan was no genius, but the spotty prefect was the kind of kid who’d stick his finger up his bum and act surprised when it didn’t smell of flowers.
‘We’ve come for Milligan. Mr Whale wants him,’ said Ivan, not showing very much respect for Miss Brotherton. That was quite risky. Miss Brotherton could be pretty fierce, in a big-nosed, woodpeckery kind of way. Which, I admit, is not the fiercest kind of fierce, but it’s more fierce than being fierce in a rabbitty way, for example.MoreLess
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