Such a Pretty Fat: One Narcissist's Quest to Discover If Her Life Makes Her Ass Look Big, Or Why Pie is Not the Answer
“Last week was a total blast, with cocktails and club sandwiches and cabbies who’d happily haul my bags. Somehow I forgot I’d be coming back to my regular life (and my real-life baggage), which is why I’m in the lobby of Jenny Craig, debating whether I should take off my underpants and bra before I hop on the scale. I’m desperately afraid to see the damages last week wrought.While I was away, I tried to fill up on vegetables and fruit when I could,132and I got a handle on portion control. When I... was at the airport, I got a low-fat yogurt parfait with strawberries and granola and threw it away when I’d finished only half. I hated wasting the food, but better in the trash than on my ass, right? Plus, I did have Barbie’s annoying little voice in my head, so I probably exercised more than I normally would have done. However, I scarfed down everything on the table at Mario’s, and each time I ordered room service, I requested two glasses of wine because, really? Wine pairs perfectly with French fries.I’m aggravated with myself for not having better control, and I will be blissfully happy today if I haven’t gained more than two pounds.MoreLess
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