Something to Believe in (The Renegade Saints book 4)
“Out of control, desperate and, fuck, even scared. I’d heard the sound again when she was in my arms the night before and it was completely screwing with my head. I spent so long avoiding the sound I’d become frightened of it. There was no middle ground for me. Early in life it had meant something positive, but after the New York sidewalk dead man seizing experience, I’d come to despise the sound. The first day I met her and I heard the beat twice, I was shaken. Then in the bathroom when we were together and I heard it, for a fleeting second it felt like I was home.
The thought shook me to my fucking core. I didn’t have a home anymore, not really. I had a place to lay my head and invite people to hang out in, but it wasn’t a home.
If drugs had still been my go-to coping mechanism, I’d have pulled out my trusty kit to use the needle to take everything away. Instead, I channeled the need to escape by deciding to work out. I got up early— don’t laugh too hard that ten in the morning is ea...rly to me.MoreLess
The thought shook me to my fucking core. I didn’t have a home anymore, not really. I had a place to lay my head and invite people to hang out in, but it wasn’t a home.
If drugs had still been my go-to coping mechanism, I’d have pulled out my trusty kit to use the needle to take everything away. Instead, I channeled the need to escape by deciding to work out. I got up early— don’t laugh too hard that ten in the morning is ea...rly to me.MoreLess
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