Pirate Dave And His Randy Adventures (Career Ending Romance Spoof)
“His crew rushed up from below, stopped short and gaped at a clump of ashy cinders that had dropped from the sky.
The ashes on the deck of the ship were gray mixed with flecks of turquoise, small pieces of skin, shards of brittle bone, and dyed blond hair. The gentle breeze off the crystal blue ocean tossed the gruesome pile about, scaring years off the lives of the deckhands.
“What the fuck is that?” Pirate Dave hissed, angry to be woken from his sixth morning nap.
“We don’t know,” Captain Crun...chy, clutching his blow-up doll Susan to his sunken chest, stammered uneasily.
“It’s black magic voodoo shit,” Calico Andy cried out, brandishing a knife and backing away from the pile that seemed to be coming to life.
A whirlwind formed the cinders into a small funnel, eliciting a gasp of shocked dismay from Pirate Dave and his below-average crew. Cackling shrieks came from within the funnel of ash. The men paled and backed away, but not Pirate Dave.
“What in the hell are you?”MoreLess
The ashes on the deck of the ship were gray mixed with flecks of turquoise, small pieces of skin, shards of brittle bone, and dyed blond hair. The gentle breeze off the crystal blue ocean tossed the gruesome pile about, scaring years off the lives of the deckhands.
“What the fuck is that?” Pirate Dave hissed, angry to be woken from his sixth morning nap.
“We don’t know,” Captain Crun...chy, clutching his blow-up doll Susan to his sunken chest, stammered uneasily.
“It’s black magic voodoo shit,” Calico Andy cried out, brandishing a knife and backing away from the pile that seemed to be coming to life.
A whirlwind formed the cinders into a small funnel, eliciting a gasp of shocked dismay from Pirate Dave and his below-average crew. Cackling shrieks came from within the funnel of ash. The men paled and backed away, but not Pirate Dave.
“What in the hell are you?”MoreLess
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