Perfectly Dateless
Perfectly Dateless
“My mother grasps the end of the dining room table, her fingers wrapped around the edges.
“Mom, the last time you used the word fabulous, I do believe it involved a shower curtain, which by its very nature cannot be fabulous, as it is plastic and cheesy. Real people have shower doors.” I drop my napkin into my lap and focus on the casserole in the middle of the table. “Or by fabulous, did you mean on clearance at Walmart?”
“Very funny, Daisy. No, I mean it this time. It’s awesome!” she says, which sounds more disturbing than fabulous. Still, she’s grinning like a hyena at dusk, and my father has come in ready to share in the kill.
“You’ll like this, Daisy. It’s a compromise.”
“I’m getting a cell phone, but I have to pay the bill?”
“No, nothing like that. Who are you going to call when you’re at school and work anyway? I’m always here and you never call me,” Mom says.
“Dad, is this news fabulous? Or does it involve either one of you dressing fly and getting jiggy with it in front of my ...classmates?”MoreLess
“Mom, the last time you used the word fabulous, I do believe it involved a shower curtain, which by its very nature cannot be fabulous, as it is plastic and cheesy. Real people have shower doors.” I drop my napkin into my lap and focus on the casserole in the middle of the table. “Or by fabulous, did you mean on clearance at Walmart?”
“Very funny, Daisy. No, I mean it this time. It’s awesome!” she says, which sounds more disturbing than fabulous. Still, she’s grinning like a hyena at dusk, and my father has come in ready to share in the kill.
“You’ll like this, Daisy. It’s a compromise.”
“I’m getting a cell phone, but I have to pay the bill?”
“No, nothing like that. Who are you going to call when you’re at school and work anyway? I’m always here and you never call me,” Mom says.
“Dad, is this news fabulous? Or does it involve either one of you dressing fly and getting jiggy with it in front of my ...classmates?”MoreLess
Write Review:
User Reviews: