No Place Safe (2013)
“They were small things, but still changed some of my perceptions: an appreciation of music I’d never bothered to listen to because it was supposed to hold no interest for me, the realization that rich white people had problems too, although they didn’t always look like mine.
Some of this discovery frightened me, made me wonder if I hadn’t crossed over as some friends had suggested I might. As a direct result of going to the school in the suburbs—at least this is what I blamed it on because I co...uld find no other reason that made any sense—I found myself with a crush on a white boy. When I started going to the school, Ma would say in a teasing way that made it clear she wasn’t playing around, Don’t come home with a white boy. There’s nothing but trouble and heartache in that. I was told by older women in my family that white men were blue-eyed devils, and didn’t mean me anything but harm in the end, no matter what sweet things they said. As a young girl, I didn’t pick up on the conviction they used in giving me this advice, a nuance I later decided must have come from some first-hand experience, some first-hand hurt.MoreLess
Some of this discovery frightened me, made me wonder if I hadn’t crossed over as some friends had suggested I might. As a direct result of going to the school in the suburbs—at least this is what I blamed it on because I co...uld find no other reason that made any sense—I found myself with a crush on a white boy. When I started going to the school, Ma would say in a teasing way that made it clear she wasn’t playing around, Don’t come home with a white boy. There’s nothing but trouble and heartache in that. I was told by older women in my family that white men were blue-eyed devils, and didn’t mean me anything but harm in the end, no matter what sweet things they said. As a young girl, I didn’t pick up on the conviction they used in giving me this advice, a nuance I later decided must have come from some first-hand experience, some first-hand hurt.MoreLess
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