Nip 'n' Tuck
“It Smells, Tastes, Looks and Spreads Like Marriage, but It Just Isn’t IT’S NOT ONLY doctors’ handwriting that is indecipherable. Their language is equally cryptic. When a physician is examining you and says, for example, ‘Hmmmmm,’ what that really means is that he has no bloody idea what the hell is wrong with you but whatever it is it’s disgusting.
‘That really is an interesting skin complaint’ decodes as ‘Excuse me while I go throw up my lunch.’ ‘Nothing to worry about’ means you’ll be dead i...n two weeks.
And the old favourite, ‘There’s good news and there’s bad news’? Well, in Hugo’s case, the good news had to be that he was having an affair with a famous daytime TV soap diva. (Well, the symptoms were definitely pointing to that dismal diagnosis.) The bad news was that I was the one who was going to have to suffer for it.
Christmas and New Year I spent boldly going nowhere. Life had put me on hold. I know I vowed to give Hugo some emotional distance.MoreLess
‘That really is an interesting skin complaint’ decodes as ‘Excuse me while I go throw up my lunch.’ ‘Nothing to worry about’ means you’ll be dead i...n two weeks.
And the old favourite, ‘There’s good news and there’s bad news’? Well, in Hugo’s case, the good news had to be that he was having an affair with a famous daytime TV soap diva. (Well, the symptoms were definitely pointing to that dismal diagnosis.) The bad news was that I was the one who was going to have to suffer for it.
Christmas and New Year I spent boldly going nowhere. Life had put me on hold. I know I vowed to give Hugo some emotional distance.MoreLess
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