Nice Jumper
“Don’t be suckered in by TV golfing injuries. Those spectators you see grinning and rubbing their ankles after John Daly’s ball has clattered into the gallery are putting on a brave face for their heroes. Two minutes later, with the TV cameras elsewhere, they’ll be reverting to their baby voice and pleading for a hot-water bottle, a comfort blanket and an ambulance. Golf balls sting. I found this out in 1990 during the annual Notts county juniors v. county police match, when Sergeant John Trevan...ean propelled me into a bunker with his hooked fairway wood shot. One second I was standing thirty yards in front of him, forty-five degrees to his left, in what I assumed was a safe position. The next I was prostrate in forty feet of sand, with a tangerine-sized lump trying to work its way out of my arm.
The first sensation, upon getting hit by a golf ball, is a mixture of dizziness and extreme pain. Then comes the easy part: a prolonged, malevolent throbbing. Finally, you feel like something is growing inside you, directly beneath the point of impact – a spherical thing, yes, but at least twice the size of the missile that hit you, and fitted with rotating teeth.MoreLess
The first sensation, upon getting hit by a golf ball, is a mixture of dizziness and extreme pain. Then comes the easy part: a prolonged, malevolent throbbing. Finally, you feel like something is growing inside you, directly beneath the point of impact – a spherical thing, yes, but at least twice the size of the missile that hit you, and fitted with rotating teeth.MoreLess
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