Invincible
“if.
Dear Stella, At this very moment, your favorite fallen cheerleader is smoking a joint out her bedroom window like a real teenage rebel. Ha! Aren’t you proud of me? Scented candles are my new best friend, especially the ones that smell like gingerbread cookies. The only problem is they make me really, really hungry.
I had a lovely visit with my school principal today. I think my cancer-survivor sympathy may be starting to wear thin with the administration. Principal Landry thought of all the... different ways to ask me how I’m doing, and I thought of all the different ways I could say “fine.” I could tell she was trying to seem caring, but really the point of the meeting was to tell me I’m in trouble because I’m failing my classes. Except the way she said it was a lot nicer: I’m not failing, I’m “falling behind.” I’ve been “lethargic in class” (i.e., stoned). And instead of saying I’m an ungrateful asshole, she said she’s disappointed that I haven’t accepted my teachers’ offers of help or been working with a tutor.MoreLess
Dear Stella, At this very moment, your favorite fallen cheerleader is smoking a joint out her bedroom window like a real teenage rebel. Ha! Aren’t you proud of me? Scented candles are my new best friend, especially the ones that smell like gingerbread cookies. The only problem is they make me really, really hungry.
I had a lovely visit with my school principal today. I think my cancer-survivor sympathy may be starting to wear thin with the administration. Principal Landry thought of all the... different ways to ask me how I’m doing, and I thought of all the different ways I could say “fine.” I could tell she was trying to seem caring, but really the point of the meeting was to tell me I’m in trouble because I’m failing my classes. Except the way she said it was a lot nicer: I’m not failing, I’m “falling behind.” I’ve been “lethargic in class” (i.e., stoned). And instead of saying I’m an ungrateful asshole, she said she’s disappointed that I haven’t accepted my teachers’ offers of help or been working with a tutor.MoreLess
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