“This is the hardest part of shopping with a two-year-old. Jeffrey’s apple, healthful consolation for all the things I have refused him, is down to the core, and he’s working himself up to a crescendo of desire. “Daddy, I want a-a- I wants a- a…” The narrow passage is walled with mints, gum, lollipops and candy bars. I manage to convince him that it’s all yucky, bad for him, that it will give him a tummyache, all the while feeling like a hypocrite because since I quit smoking I always have some ...gum or candy in my pocket. Then he turns to the film, batteries, cigarettes, and tabloids. I explain to him that cigarettes are also yucky. A headline reads: “Man With Split Personality Weds Self.” The woman ahead of us pushes our groceries back with her forearm, tumbling stacked cans, and whacks a wooden stick between our orders. When Jeffrey grabs a bag of disposable razors, I take it from him. He squeezes shut his eyes, his face gets red, and he howls. Four bags. Sixty dollars.MoreLessRead More Read Less
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