In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks: And Other Complaints From An Angry Middle-Aged White Guy
“You should drink at least eight full tumblers a day. That’s the key to weight loss. I’d love to see a chart from 1979 with average water consumption on one side and average weight on the other. I know as the water consumption goes up, so will the weight. We drink more water than ever, yet we’re fatter than ever. How can this be the key to nutrition and weight loss? And if another asshole gives me the speech about our bodies being 70 percent water, I’m going to make his face 100 percent fist. Ho...w much water do we really need to consume? I spent the better part of my youth running wind sprints on a football field in the San Fernando Valley during the dog days of summer in full gear with nary a bottle of water in sight. As a matter of fact, at that time they thought water was bad for you so they deprived us of it. And there wasn’t one fat kid on that football team. Except Higginstaller, but I think that was a thyroid problem.Obviously it’s a multibillion-dollar-a-year industry that preys on our obsession with health, our children, and body image.MoreLess
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