“Fifty percent are drunks. And up until very recently, writers in Hollywood were gag-men. Most of them are still gag-men, but we call them writers.” —Robert DeNiro, as “Monroe Stahr” CUT TO: EXT. HIGH-RISE ROOFTOP—DAY. OUR HERO runs to escape three QUORUM HENCHMEN, all the while dodging the spray of BULLETS coming out of their AK-47s. When he reaches the edge, he looks over it— To see a seven-story drop onto RAILROAD TRACKS. SFX: TRAIN, now coming into sight and moving at bullet speed—so quickly, in fact, that the CABOOSE is already in view. It’s now or never. Our Hero takes a flying leap off the building— And lands on top of the train, crouching, like a cat. He looks up at the henchmen. Angrily, they shake their fists at him. Smiling, he rises triumphantly to his feet, and waves back. CUT TO: “Let me get this straight—neither of you have ever jumped off the roof of a seven-story building, onto a moving train?” Justin DeVane may be a hipster screenwriter who wrote a Me Generation navel...-gazing Sundance Film Festival Jury Recognition winner and parlayed that into a career as a script doctor, but the truth of the matter is that he’s dumb as a post when it comes to physics.MoreLessShow More Show Less
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