“I remained paralyzed until the moment when I accepted the most bitter truth of all: I was not suffering from grief; I was wallowing in self-pity.
That same night, I walked away. From the dojo, from my living quarters above it, from my life. I did not write a suicide note, because it was not my intent to die. I had not earned such a privilege.
I rejected the code of the warrior as I had that of the priests. A true priest, like a true warrior, fears nothing but dishonor. I feared nothing on this earth, and I was already dishonored. There was no name I knew for a man who has learned to serve something far greater than his meaningless self.
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