Guy Noir And the Straight Skinny
“If you saw me in church, sorry, but that was someone else, not me. I don’t go. For one thing, organ music reminds me of creepy movies about deformed people. And for another, the sermons just get dumber and dumber. Priests used to address the subject of sin, and now, for fear of offending the sensitive, they mostly talk goodness and mercy, and if they talk about sin, they come at it from the wrong direction—”Alas, alas that man is capable of such despicable things!”—whereas the private eye accepts that the despicable thing was done and asks, “Why was this done and by whom?” Big difference. Bad people are capable of inexplicable nobility and good people can be meaner than skunks. Man is capable of larceny, rape, incest, murder, and all sorts of dark deeds that would horrify your average coyote, and that’s a fact, so don’t pretend that the Golden Rule is who we are. Mr. Larry was out to slit my throat, and I had to stop him by whatever means. Simple as that. Why waste time on moral indignation?
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