Getting Married
Getting Married
“When we go out for beer at Mickie’s with our friends, he studies me taking every sip of beer, as if I’m some junkie who can’t be trusted with any mind-altering substance, even something as innocuous as beer.
This is what fucking freaks me out. On Sunday night, I suddenly, out of nowhere, get this incredibly intense desire to get high. I think briefly about all the terrible things about taking drugs. The heart attacks, getting hooked, getting thrown in jail, and I think, no, no, that’s not g...oing to happen, I just want to get high tonight. I can’t stop thinking about calling Sandy and seeing if she can hook me up. I try to think of lies I can tell Will to get out of the house so I can meet her.
But I get through the night sober. Several more times over the next couple weeks, my craving for drugs nearly overwhelms me. The craving is so intense that things like getting thrown in jail don’t seem like that big of a deal. Jail? Bah! A trivial detail.MoreLess
This is what fucking freaks me out. On Sunday night, I suddenly, out of nowhere, get this incredibly intense desire to get high. I think briefly about all the terrible things about taking drugs. The heart attacks, getting hooked, getting thrown in jail, and I think, no, no, that’s not g...oing to happen, I just want to get high tonight. I can’t stop thinking about calling Sandy and seeing if she can hook me up. I try to think of lies I can tell Will to get out of the house so I can meet her.
But I get through the night sober. Several more times over the next couple weeks, my craving for drugs nearly overwhelms me. The craving is so intense that things like getting thrown in jail don’t seem like that big of a deal. Jail? Bah! A trivial detail.MoreLess
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