Fungus of the Heart
“They never tried to eat me. But their mere presence in a lake or swimming pool or bathtub was always enough to ravage my psyche.
And so, as Rhianna speaks, I see barracuda swimming in and out of her mouth. They taunt me with knowing winks, because I failed in my last barracuda case. But I keep that to myself.
“Did you buy the cranberry sauce?” I say.
“I did,” Rhianna says. “And I bought you the crunchy peanut butter and the barbeque chips.”
“Rhianna. Those were only alternatives..., in case they were out of cranberry sauce.”
“I know. But I wanted to make it up to you for calling you Monoxide all those times.”
“I’ve been called worse. And I already told you, I don’t take disbelief personally. You found out your water heater was malfunctioning, so it’s only natural to assume carbon monoxide poisoning.”
“That doesn’t excuse my behavior, Ash.”MoreLess
And so, as Rhianna speaks, I see barracuda swimming in and out of her mouth. They taunt me with knowing winks, because I failed in my last barracuda case. But I keep that to myself.
“Did you buy the cranberry sauce?” I say.
“I did,” Rhianna says. “And I bought you the crunchy peanut butter and the barbeque chips.”
“Rhianna. Those were only alternatives..., in case they were out of cranberry sauce.”
“I know. But I wanted to make it up to you for calling you Monoxide all those times.”
“I’ve been called worse. And I already told you, I don’t take disbelief personally. You found out your water heater was malfunctioning, so it’s only natural to assume carbon monoxide poisoning.”
“That doesn’t excuse my behavior, Ash.”MoreLess
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