Elvis And the Grateful Dead (2009)
“I like hanging out at Everlasting Monuments. People don’t pop off like flies in Mooreville, so the pace is slow and lazy around here.
Even dogs live longer (the clean air and laid-back lifestyle, I guess), which suits my purposes fine. I have a big agenda, like seeing all the Valentines settled down and happy. I don’t want to be hampered by having to give up my sassy basset suit and come back as something else. What if I came back as a cow? Of course, knowing my resourcefulness, I’d figure some... way to get right into the middle of Valentine business, even if it meant learning to moo six bars of “Love Me Tender.” Ruby Nell’s inside polishing her toenails purple and watching Days of Our Lives. She’s partial to soaps and keeps the nineteen-inch TV in her office blaring at all times, even when customers are here. They’re so distraught they don’t notice, anyhow, and I’ve never seen a woman multitask the way Ruby Nell Valentine can. I’m probably the only one who notices she can follow every line of a soap saga while inventing creative tombstone slogans like Martha baked her way to Glory and is preparing a big banquet in the sky.MoreLess
Even dogs live longer (the clean air and laid-back lifestyle, I guess), which suits my purposes fine. I have a big agenda, like seeing all the Valentines settled down and happy. I don’t want to be hampered by having to give up my sassy basset suit and come back as something else. What if I came back as a cow? Of course, knowing my resourcefulness, I’d figure some... way to get right into the middle of Valentine business, even if it meant learning to moo six bars of “Love Me Tender.” Ruby Nell’s inside polishing her toenails purple and watching Days of Our Lives. She’s partial to soaps and keeps the nineteen-inch TV in her office blaring at all times, even when customers are here. They’re so distraught they don’t notice, anyhow, and I’ve never seen a woman multitask the way Ruby Nell Valentine can. I’m probably the only one who notices she can follow every line of a soap saga while inventing creative tombstone slogans like Martha baked her way to Glory and is preparing a big banquet in the sky.MoreLess
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