“Long after we had sadly staggered back to our lodgings, Mike Kelly, a heavy young man who had captained the first fifteen for several years and was now Mr Hubert Cambridge’s house surgeon, found himself standing on the empty pavement in his dinner jacket with only fourpence in his pocket. He resigned himself to walking back to the hospital, deciding to go by way of Covent Garden because he had heard that the pubs opened in the early hours to slake the thirsts of the busy fruiterers. Unfortunate...ly, alcohol always had a confusing effect on Mike Kelly, and after trying to buy a drink in St Peter’s Hospital for Stone and Stricture under the impression that it was the Strand Palace Hotel, he demonstrated his belief that the Royal Opera House was a gentleman’s convenience. When a policeman shouted at him unnecessarily, ‘’Ere! What do you think you’re doing?’ Mike Kelly made what he thought at the time to be the smartest remark of his life. Beaming at the constable he announced benignly, ‘Officer, I am picking bloody gooseberries.’ Mike was then taken to nearby Bow Street and charged with being drunk and disorderly.MoreLessRead More Read Less
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