Diary of a Radical Mermaid
“In my opinion, the entire Caribbean, along with every fruity rum drink, jerk chicken dinner, ‘Hallo, Mon,’ accent, and Rastafarian dreadlock should be swallowed by a massive tidal wave.
But then, maybe I’m just in a bad mood because I’m locked in the Jamaican equivalent of a Vegas high-roller’s suite.
“Juna Lee?” my guard called through the teak double doors in her coy Hispanic drawl. She was six feet tall, two feet wide, and built like a brick lighthouse. An Amazon. A freakin’ Amazon Mer was guarding my door, night and day. The Queen Latifah of Mer Mamas, guarding me. “Juna Lee, you prissy little puta, you better answer me.”
I stood and yelled, “Listen, you Araiza-employed knuckle-dragger, obviously I’m not going to throw myself off a fifth floor balcony when you’re not looking. I’m not a flying fish.”
“Jordan Brighton sent you a gift. Behave and I’ll open the doors and hand it to you. Si?”
I was off to the doors in a flash. My warden unlocked the door, opened it a few inches, then t...hrust a beautifully wrapped little box at me.MoreLess
But then, maybe I’m just in a bad mood because I’m locked in the Jamaican equivalent of a Vegas high-roller’s suite.
“Juna Lee?” my guard called through the teak double doors in her coy Hispanic drawl. She was six feet tall, two feet wide, and built like a brick lighthouse. An Amazon. A freakin’ Amazon Mer was guarding my door, night and day. The Queen Latifah of Mer Mamas, guarding me. “Juna Lee, you prissy little puta, you better answer me.”
I stood and yelled, “Listen, you Araiza-employed knuckle-dragger, obviously I’m not going to throw myself off a fifth floor balcony when you’re not looking. I’m not a flying fish.”
“Jordan Brighton sent you a gift. Behave and I’ll open the doors and hand it to you. Si?”
I was off to the doors in a flash. My warden unlocked the door, opened it a few inches, then t...hrust a beautifully wrapped little box at me.MoreLess
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