Dawn of the Dumb

Authors: Charlie Brooker

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“Watching a burglar shoot your cat. Eating a punnet of vomit and faeces. Unpleasant experiences all—but none, surely, is quite as unpleasant as grimly chewing your way through an entire edition of The Jeremy Kyle Show (ITV1). Officially, it’s described as a ‘confrontational talkshow in which guests thrash out their conflicts, dilemmas and relationship issues in front of a studio audience’, although that doesn’t come close to capturing the flavour of it. That just makes it sound like Trisha, the ...show it’s replaced. It isn’t like Trisha. It’s worse. It makes Trisha look like a dainty philanthropists’ tea dance. The key word in that official description is ‘confrontational’, because Jeremy’s USP, you see, is that he’s unafraid to hurl abuse at his hapless idiot guests. So when some greasy bi-toothed, boss-eyed scumball is guffawing about how many times he shoved it up his girlfriend’s mother, Kyle shouts something like ‘You amoeba of a man!’ The audience applaud, the chav is humbled, and Jeremy seems secretly pleased.MoreLess Read More Read Less