Byron Easy
“For a week. Difficult to believe, I know. It’s hard to gauge whether I’m still in love or not, but the ancient Greek dramaturgical laws governing human emotional confluence, the fixed mysteries of astrology, the films of Woody Allen tell me that I probably never was in love: I was mental. That seems to be the state one emerges into after demolishing three years of marriage in one abysmal afternoon. One finds oneself—in all clinical reality—insane.
What happened was this. After the final flat-de...stroying screaming marathon with her, I found myself on the street struggling with an Elastoplast to stem the rich flow of blood from the fingertip she had all but sliced off with a kitchen knife. A meagre palliative, I agree, but that’s all I possessed, except twenty cigarettes and my hastily snatched notebooks. My first port of call was Rudi’s. His only words of wisdom were: ‘Life’s a bitch and then you marry one,’ although said with such Scottish certainty that I’ll only ever be able to hear that aperçu (and I hear it a lot, usually just before I go to sleep at night) in his accent.MoreLess
What happened was this. After the final flat-de...stroying screaming marathon with her, I found myself on the street struggling with an Elastoplast to stem the rich flow of blood from the fingertip she had all but sliced off with a kitchen knife. A meagre palliative, I agree, but that’s all I possessed, except twenty cigarettes and my hastily snatched notebooks. My first port of call was Rudi’s. His only words of wisdom were: ‘Life’s a bitch and then you marry one,’ although said with such Scottish certainty that I’ll only ever be able to hear that aperçu (and I hear it a lot, usually just before I go to sleep at night) in his accent.MoreLess
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