Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn't Good Enough
“NO ORDINARY HONESTY What prevents us from being fully known?
The greatest adversary to being fully known is dishonesty. And fear is the driving force in most of our dishonesty. Our fears are often greater than our desire for intimacy and leave our marriages ordinary.
Those who compromise honesty generally do so because of three fears: fear of being exposed, fear of emotional pain, and fear of not being loved. When any of these fears is larger than our desire for intimacy, ordinary becomes the n...orm in our marriages.
Many of us have something in our lives that we hope no one finds out. Many of us live with secrets that even our spouses don’t know. Maybe it’s the number of people we slept with before marriage. Maybe it’s an eating disorder we had or currently struggle with. Maybe it’s lustful thoughts about a coworker. Maybe it’s a pornography addiction. Maybe it’s abuse we suffered as children.
Our secrets don’t always have to be something we’ve done; often they are something that was done to us.MoreLess
The greatest adversary to being fully known is dishonesty. And fear is the driving force in most of our dishonesty. Our fears are often greater than our desire for intimacy and leave our marriages ordinary.
Those who compromise honesty generally do so because of three fears: fear of being exposed, fear of emotional pain, and fear of not being loved. When any of these fears is larger than our desire for intimacy, ordinary becomes the n...orm in our marriages.
Many of us have something in our lives that we hope no one finds out. Many of us live with secrets that even our spouses don’t know. Maybe it’s the number of people we slept with before marriage. Maybe it’s an eating disorder we had or currently struggle with. Maybe it’s lustful thoughts about a coworker. Maybe it’s a pornography addiction. Maybe it’s abuse we suffered as children.
Our secrets don’t always have to be something we’ve done; often they are something that was done to us.MoreLess
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