All I Have Left
“Maybe it was when we finally had sex. Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was way before that.
I can, however, vividly remember the numbness I felt when I left. Numbness was the only emotion I’ve felt for years. I’ve existed without really living and that’s not as easy as you would think. Evie has been in my life since I was old enough to remember.
I couldn’t leave. I didn’t want to. Constantly in the arms of others, that’s when I realized what she was doing. For a while, I thought maybe I might have a s...hot with her but she always seemed to be in relationships, ones she was always ending for me. She was pushing them away for the sake of me and my sanity. And then we fucked up and one night took our messing around a little too far. She cheated on her boyfriend with me. I wasn’t proud of that. Not at all.
The night of graduation I realized what we were doing. Despite intentions full of pride, it hit me like a ton of bricks. It would always be that way with us. I wouldn’t sit back and watch any longer.MoreLess
I can, however, vividly remember the numbness I felt when I left. Numbness was the only emotion I’ve felt for years. I’ve existed without really living and that’s not as easy as you would think. Evie has been in my life since I was old enough to remember.
I couldn’t leave. I didn’t want to. Constantly in the arms of others, that’s when I realized what she was doing. For a while, I thought maybe I might have a s...hot with her but she always seemed to be in relationships, ones she was always ending for me. She was pushing them away for the sake of me and my sanity. And then we fucked up and one night took our messing around a little too far. She cheated on her boyfriend with me. I wasn’t proud of that. Not at all.
The night of graduation I realized what we were doing. Despite intentions full of pride, it hit me like a ton of bricks. It would always be that way with us. I wouldn’t sit back and watch any longer.MoreLess
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