A Tenderfoot in Southern California Down to Date

presents, further up town in another block. They aint the only heathens selling out in that town, either. One night when I was bumming around town I just naturally strolled into a jewelry auction. That auctioneer was sure a dandy. He sold those suckers?(men suckers I mean)?solid gold watches for $1.95 guaranteed. There were plenty of women suckers there; yep, bunches of 'em, and they bit harder than any man in the crowd. They bid as high as five cents at a jump, and bid right over their own bids, until the auctioneer tickled so hard, he had to blow his nose to hide the laugh. His face was as red as a beet, and he nearly busted holding in, while he kept on saying, " Lady, dont let it get away from you for only half a dime. If you cant use it for cake spoon, you can use it to spank the baby with." Then some reckless woman would risk five cents more, and get it. Mebbe when she counted out her change, it was all in nickels and dimes, and the old pocketbook was busted at both ends and mighty flat in the middle, but she held her head high as she sailed out of the store, with a silver plated baby spanker, and ten chances to one, she was an old maid, with no immediate prospects. But there were others in that crowd?not old maids, but suckers. Yep, he hooked me, all right, and before I knew it, I had paid $1.75for a genuine diamond scarf pin as big as a marble and just about as brilliant. I met Jones as I came out of the ... --This text refers to the Paperback edition.